Merry Christmas!!

This Says it all!! Merry Christmas!!

This is my favorite holiday of the year! I love the cheer, the snow, Santa, and most of all, The real meaning of Christmas.

It is a time when the young and old come together, to enjoy the one thing we all have in common......the desire to be happy!

I love it that I have the ability to make my children happy at this time of year. My heart breaks for those who don't or can't.

Like this picture, may your Christmas be warm, cozy and full of happy, safe feelings!

Love to you all!

I'm sitting here on my bed with my new laptop for the first time. It feels good to recline! I am just getting used to it and learning how to use it. I couldn't figure out the sound and then I something and it worked. I still don't know what I did! Or how to do it again or change it!

Today was a very special day. My brother and sister in law were sealed to their new baby they adopted. He was their foster baby and then were able to keep him. I cried of course. The spirit through out was very strong and beautiful. There are some things that you just know are right and this was one of them. It made me yearn for the day we adopt Wyatt. I can't wait.

We are all now sitting on my bed watching "The wizard of Oz." I have so many memories of watching that movie and now here I am, sitting on my big bed with my beautiful children watching it. I think I have the best family possible. We are so happy. Our lives are so beautiful and perfect. I have the greatest kids and I adore them. We have so much fun together and I cherish these moments when they are young!

I already mourn the day they grow up and leave home. I love being a mother and I may not be perfect at it but I feel I do my best. My kids are happy, wall adjusted and so fun to hang with. Except in the car!! Life really is beautiful.

It has finally snowed. It makes me so happy! If it is going to be winter anyway, I want it to be beautiful. I love how lacy the trees look and the crunch beneath my feet.

As you all know, it is Friday. In fact, it is free Friday! On Free Fridays there are no chores that need to be done. The kids have a day off. I love it but the house has to be clean on Thurs. for a Free Friday to take affect.

We bought a new lap top. It has been very fun. We will mostly use it for the business but I am excited to to be able to play the highly addictive, terribly violent, satanic game of World of Warcraft with the hubby now. It will be a great date night. It is something we enjoy doing together.

So anyway, I am looking forward to a wonderful weekend with no surprises or stresses. I hope the same for you all!

Today I am feel great gratitude. We had an experience this weekend that can really bring you to your knees. I am feeling immense gratitude for modern medicine.

As some of you may know, We have had that awful flu at our house. I have found out since that doctors think it is a strain of to Roto virus.

Jake had gotten sick on Sunday night last, then Heidi and I were sick Wed. night. Up all night throwing up and diarrhea like water. Cramps that were worse than any of my labors.

Thursday night Wyatt, started throwing up and started with the diarrhea. We couldn't get fluids in him fast enough. He devoured every bottle. Dying of thirst. Over the course of just a few hours, I would learn, that he had lost about a pound of fluids. In the middle of the night we rushed him to Mc Kay Dee hospital.

From tests we learned that his sodium levels were unusually high. If they hydrated him too fast with those sodium levels, he would have seizures and could have brain swelling. He was much more ill than even we had anticipated. If we had lived 100 years ago, he would have died by morning.

I can't believe how fast it went. Fine one day and deathly ill in the next few hours. They hooked him up to an IV and took tests to see if they needed to fly him to Primary Hospital. They decided to keep him there and they admitted him to the pediatric ward. They took labs every two hours at first.

That was the worst experience of our lives. Here we were, holding our beautiful baby down while he screamed as they stuck needles into his little feet to get blood. He would look at us with wonder in his eyes, asking us why we were allowing this. I cannot describe how this made us feel.

The next day Doctor Lloyd, whom we adore, came and changed all the orders. The kind of iv fluid, how often to take blood and what to give him. Wyatt had not been allowed to have anything oral that whole first day. It was terrible. Dr, Lloyd was furious that he hadn't been called by the hospital sooner. I thought they had called him. He made them quit doing labs as often as he felt they were torturing our baby. Which is exactly what it was.

To make a long 3 day weekend short, his numbers leveled, he gained his weight back, the diarrhea ended and it all turned around for the better.

On Sunday morning as I rocked him, 2 older men came in to give me the sacrament. I have taken the sacrament my whole life. I can't count how many times I have heard the sacrament prayers, but at this moment, as these men knelt at my feet, and prayed, the words hit me like a flood of emotion. I started to cry. This is why Christ came. This was why he did what he did. For me and my poor baby who lay in my arms. It is in moments like these, moments of extreme pain and gratitude that the magnitude of what he did hits me.

Thank heavens for these miracles. It doesn't seem fair that 100 years ago a mother would have lost her beautiful child.

So, I am full of gratitude today. I'm so glad it's over.

Chrismas Meme

I stole this from Jenny at "little family" I loved it and tag anyone who reads it!

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags?

Wrapping paper. I have to make it as difficult as possible for my kids to peak.

2. Real tree or artificial?

I prefer real trees. I always had a real one growing up but I have an artificial tree now. Less stress and worry.

3. When do you put up the tree?

I have been doing it the first week of December but I was raised doing it the day after Thanksgiving.

4. When do you take the tree down?

My mother was adamant about taking it down on New Years Eve day but I am not always so strict about that!

5. Do you like eggnog?

My husband converted me but it has to have sprite and nutmeg! That's my favorite.

6. Favorite gift received as a child?

The one that instantly comes to mind is a My Friend Mandy doll I got when I was about 4. I still have that doll and I still love her.

7. Do you have a nativity scene?

Definitely. Mine is made of olive wood from the Holy Land. It is beautiful and was my mothers. She was given it from a friend who had traveled to the Holy Land.

8. Hardest person to buy for?

My sister in law. We have them this year. They already have EVERYTHING!

9. Easiest person to buy for?

ME!!! I love to shop for me! I like anything. ANYTHING!!!

10. Worst Christmas gift you ever received?

To be honest, bullets. My hubby really wanted me to love hunting. It didn't take! lol

11. Mail or email Christmas cards
Mail the cards for sure. There is nothing better than getting a card in the mail.

12. Favorite Christmas Movie?

How the Grinch Stole Christmas. I love the carton and the Jim Carey one.

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas?

I start early and it is so hard to stop even when I'm done.

14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present?

I think I have but I don't remember!

15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas?

Turkey. I always associate turkey with Christmas day.

16. Clear lights or colored on the tree?

I like the clear lights but was raised with the colored kind. In fact, as a kid we had those big bulbs with the silver reflectors.

17. Favorite Christmas song?

I don't have a favorite. I love them all! But, if I have to choose it would be the Hallelujah chorus.

18. Travel at Christmas or stay home?

I love to stay home but we always drive down to Salt Lake to visit Grandma in the afternoon.

19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer?

Of course!

20. Angel on the tree top or a star?

I love a star. We have always had a star.

21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning?

We always open one Christmas Eve and they are PJ's

22. Most annoying thing about this time of year?

Is there something annoying about this time of year? If so, I don't know what it is!

24. Do you buy gifts for your pets?

No. I like to spend it on family.

25. Have you ever been Christmas caroling?

Yep! But not lately.

26. Hot chocolate or hot apple cider?

Both please!!! Thank you very much! But it depends on my mood!

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!

What a wonderful Sunday we had. Jacob and I played a piano duet in Sacrament meeting. We played "The first Noel". It went beautifully. This was the first time Jake has ever done something like this and was pretty nervous but it didn't show.

He got tons of compliments and felt so good about it. Then he was ordained as second councilor of is deacon's quorum.

All in all it was a very good day for him! I went to choir practice which I haven't done in ages. I have felt so crappy for so long!

It is amazing what we do for our kids. I DO NOT love performing in front of people like that but I know it is good for him to do so I grin and bare it.

Ah, the joys of parenthood.

The Messiah

Have you ever heard anything as powerful and beautiful and the "Hallelujah Chorus"?

Last night was our community Messiah sing in. The community orchestra with a choir and 4 soloists perform and each time they come to a "Chorus" the audience joins the choir in song.

I love it. It is one of my favorite things to do during the holiday season. There is something magical when you hear "King of Kings! Lord of Lords! Forever and ever and ever!! Hallelujah! Hallelujah!"

It sends chills to my toes. Chills to know that at the very first performance, even the King who heard it recognized it's greatness and could not stay seated. He rose from his throne in honor of the true King of kings. That is why it is a tradition that everyone stands when that song is performed. The spirit just soars with that song.

I love the Savior and at this time of year, the music just solidifies my testimony even stronger. I so want to be the kind of person He wants me to be. I so often fall short. Thank heaven for His saving grace. Hallelujah! Forever and ever!

MERRY CHRISTMAS SEASON!!!

This is the picture we attached to our Christmas Card. I love it. I think it turned out good but I have cut my hair since then. I have decided I like it short. It looks good.

I have also figured out how to send my pictures online to Walmart to be printed. That saves me time and money. Love that. Got the idea for Lisa.

So, I am feeling so much better. I am so glad to not feel so tired and sick. What a good feeling to have my health back. I want to start running again but am afraid to start. Does anyone know that feeling?

It is hard to describe. I don't want to fail. I don't want it to hurt, I want to be able to run like the wind and am afraid it wont be that way. I need to just start. I miss the high I used to feel when I ran. I have gained 10 pounds this year and my body feels yucky. I don't want to get old and fall apart and yet, I am afraid to start. Explain that one to me!

So I will attempt it today, if I can force myself.... he he

How many of you out there love psychology? I do. I studied it in school, I love the color code, I love the 5 love languages etc..... I love to learn about new and interesting ways to over analyze!

Well, we can use that information with my new post. I have had an ongoing argument with my husband about having my name oh his business account. He wants me to do work for the business but not be a part of it ( I felt).

So last Saturday, we were on our were on our way to the bank together for the first time in ages. Well, I won. We put me on the account. I just wanted to feel a part of "our" business. You know, it actually worked. I knew it would. I feel like this is now my business too. I started a new filing system, we bought Quick books, which we had wanted to do for a while and I completely cleaned out and re-organized our office area. It feels so good to be a part of it.

I don't know what his problem was before but my word,. I do a lot of work and I want my name In gold on a plaque on the door. I am a yellow after all!

I love to shop. There is no there time of year more conducive to shopping than Christmas time. I wish I could shop continuously but I have to wait until I have money in my hands you know!

I found a beautiful bunk bed on sale at KSL.com and went to buy it from a wholesale furniture dealer! It is so pretty and I will put it up in Heidi's room and when Wyatt is bigger, He'll share her room and have a bed. Her room is to small to put 2 beds in side by side so I bought this for dirt cheap! I bought it is in white though and it will look good in her pink pepto-bismal bedroom!

Anyway, they had a beautiful solid leather living room set I was tempted to buy but refrained. After all, I didn't have THAT much money with me!

I love decorating my house and making it better. I can only do it slowly which is frustrating but little by little, it is becoming more of what I like.

Here is a little side note. Bryan listens to talk radio when he drives and they were saying that Utah is #1 for depression and Meth use. Interesting isn't it? Of all places. Guess which state is the happiest. You will never guess!! South Dakota! That is where we were thinking a going a while ago. Now Bry says So. Dakota is looking better and better! It must be all that farming and hard work that makes people happy! Idaho was high up there too for happiness. We are right next door. What is the difference I wonder? One thing they said was that possibly people here are harder on themselves to do better because of the religion issue and get depressed when they don't measure up to themselves! Who knows?

Anyway, that is the new for today!

Here is the latest! Court was yesterday and it was 4 1/2 hours long and what it all finally came to was no re-unification! YEA!!!!

Re-unification means the state has to help to parent get their child back. The state sets up the plan and offers all the therapy and parenting and drug classes etc....

This Judge is so great. He was the one who did our adoption with Gabe. He said he felt like it was Groundhogs day. That this was the same discussion he has been having with these two people for 4 years. He felt that they had been begged and pleaded with and provided opportunity after opportunity and never rose to the occasion.

Even just last Oct they had both been arrested for being together and having drugs all over the house.

I started to cry when he said that. I was so sure they were going to give reunification. I am so relieved. I just needed to have more faith. I had had numerous answers to prayers that it would all work out but I still couldn't believe it would.

I also just heard that the family who has the 2 sisters of Gabe might not be interested in adopting and they would come to me. It scares the crap out of me but I would not say no. Those poor little girls have been passed around like dirty laundry. At least we could keep them all together.

If that happens, I refuse to listen to anyone's opinion about it. I have already discussed it with certain family members who are extremely negative about it. That is not what I need to hear. No body wants them and I will NOT be another one who says no. They need someone to love and raise them and give them a normal childhood. I know I could do it. I also know there would be times when it was hard and I would want to sell them on e-bay but there are days when I want to do that with my own kids!

People can either support us or keep their mouths shut. That is my opinion. Anyway, that may or may not happen so I'll let you know.

Good morning! It is Tuesday and I feel like I can get nothing done with this little baby! He is so beautiful. For those of you out there who want kids and can't have them, you really aught to try foster care. Both of mine were babies, because that is what I chose.

Many times these kids are adopted by you. My dear friend Tash just got a 3 week old baby girl last week. She is beautiful and has tons of dark hair! She has wanted a baby girl for a while.

My sister in law is in the process of adopting her foster daughter's newborn and is also adopting a 10 month old boy they have had since infancy. They had been trying to have kids for 11 years.


They say you shouldn't go in to foster care with adoption as the goal but man, it is a great way to grow your family and you don't pay a dime! The state pays for all the adoption fees and the child has a Medicaid card until he is 18. They are always covered.

These kids need good homes. Most of the time, the birth parents just don't get straightened out. It is very sad but happens all too often. At least these kids are being given a chance at a normal, healthy life.

It does come with it's added stressed but my babies were worth it. Think about it.

Well get this, I had missed a message on my cell phone that I found yesterday. It was from my doctor telling me I was positive for Mono. How do you like that. They called and left a message on my home phone that said I was normal on the results on Monday and left a message on my cell on Friday saying I had mono.

So I will have to call on this Monday to make sure but I am pretty sure it was mono. I do feel better but I am still not over it.

Thanksgiving day was wonderful. We went to 2 dinners but it was so fun seeing everyone. The only bad thing about going somewhere else is that there are no leftovers to eat.

We changed Wyatt over to Prevacid and that is working SO much better for his heartburn. The other worked ok for about a week and then he went back to his fussiness. Let's hope this lasts!

It is Saturday and I am wondering if I feel like getting all the Christmas stuff out. Half the kids are sick with this cold and I don't have the energy to do it alone.

Well, I'm tired. Got to go! Love to you all this happy season!

It was a really good day. I am feeling better and my energy is coming back. Today, I cleaned Seth and Gabe's room which I do a deep clean every few months. It is amazing the amount of garbage they hide in there!

I went to the DI and bought a new mattress and box spring for him. He has needed a bed for a while now and has shared with Jake for the past year. Both are fed up with that arrangement. They sell really nice new ones there. So I came home, set it up, put a cute book shelf in there for his stuff and he has a cowboy motif so I got on eBay and bought matching cowboy quilts for Seth and Gabe.

The quilts are adorable. They have matching shams and the colors match the room perfectly!. I can't wait until they come. They are new too which I like. I don't like to use "used" bedding.

So when the room is complete. I'll take a picture for you all!

I love shopping online. Fast and easy!

For all of you who are dying to know what went down for Jake's B-day, here it is.........

He came home from school on Wednesday, I sat him down, explained the deal and let him decide. I did explain how awful I felt and that next year, when he turns 13, a real teenager, we'd throw him a big party.

He went with the "Rip stick" . What a good boy and let me tell you how relieved I was! I am still not up to par and it is Friday!

He wanted a cherry pie instead of cake so I made him a Pie and we had ice cream melting over it. Wonderful. We had his favorite dinner, tacos, and taco salads and he didn't have to do any chores.

He loved that. It ended up being a wonderful day and he was SO happy with his presents. I was so happy with less work and everyone went to bed with a smile on including Bry and me. We were in bed by 8:30!

Change of subject. I weighed myself this morning. I haven't done that for a while because I had just decided to "live" and enjoy life and not worry about weight anymore. Well, I am the heaviest I have ever been except when I was pregnant. It was a blow to my self image just a little. I had noticed that my clothes were tighter and didn't "feel" good but I had decided to love myself the way I am.

OK, I have changed my mind. I don't like the way my body feels. I don't like that my bra digs in and I can't wait to take it off. I hate how my pants feel tight and uncomfortable and all the rest that goes with it. I really hate how I have a roll under by boobs that would have a bigger bra size than the girls upstairs! I don't know what do do because I love food and I hate restricting myself, but until I can start running again, I guess I should just a little. I am getting to old to ignore my health.

I don't want to be one of the elderly that is constantly battling illness or disease because I just wanted to "live". That would be contradictory wouldn't it??

So, I don't know what I will do. I'll let you know. But something has to change.

OK, I need to know if I am the worst mother in the world. Jacob's birthday is tomorrow. We have planned a big fear factor party with his friends tomorrow. The problem is I still feel like crap. It is getting better but I have not cleaned my house in a week.

I am doing better than before, but I am still up nights with coughing and the baby. I sound terrible and have no energy. I do not want to do this party. I just feel awful.

He wants a skate board really bad that has only 2 wheels called a rip board or something. It is really expensive so I thought maybe I would bribe him with that instead of the party. I can't buy it normally but if we don't have the party, I would. Is that terrible?

I feel like a really good mom would just push through it. Would just stay up all night cleaning the house and decorating.. Never mind the coughing fits when I talk too much, he would have a great party.

The realistic mom in me says bag it, no one has RSVP'd anyway and bribe him with the skate board so I don't feel like such a loser. Dang. He'll be home in a half hour. I'll let you know what happens.

I have been sick all weekend. Yuck. A bad cold. It started as an innocent sore throat. Who knew it would attack when I least expected it to! Today, I am stuffed up and head achey, tired and coughing. I have still managed to clean my bathroom, fold 4 batches of laundry, take care of the kids, shower and get dressed. I must congratulate myself!

There is nothing worse than feeling under par. I even had a blood test done which came back normal. That means I must be faking! Ha! It was actually good news. Now I have to wonder why I have felt so out of sorts.

I have decided it is a new baby, not enough rest, eating like crap and the constant worry that they will take him away. Plus the other normal stresses of life. Maybe it is stress that completely disrupts our lives. Maybe we just think we are coping when in real life, we are just floating along waiting to get bombarded!

I do believe there is a connection between our health and our brains. I do believe there are things we bring upon ourselves. I do think there are weird flukes out there but really, when we don't get enough rest, exercise, good food, and too much stress, disappointment and negativity, why would it surprise us when we have heart problems, cancer, and illness? Hello??

Anyway. That is how I feel today. There it is. Now I will go lay down until the kids come home. I need to gear up for my conversation with my son. I need to find out why he has an "I" in health and math. Supposedly he caught himself up. I love being able to check it on the computer. Yea for technology.

Random thoughts

I like Lisa's idea about random thoughts. I think I will do it too.

1. I went to the doctor to get a flu shot today. They were out when I got there. They took blood to run tests to see why I am sooooo tired all the time. He thinks I could have mono. I don't think I am making out enough to have mono! lol They will test my thyroid, and for Epstein bar and a few others too. It will be interesting to see what happens if anything at all.

2. My oldest turns 12 next week. We are going to have a fear factor party for him. It will be a blast.

3. I am so tired and out of it that I got the wrong day on the vote and missed it. I also showed up early for my doctors app. today. I went at 9:30 when I was supposed to go at 10:45. What a space cadet.

4. My sister had her 3rd baby this week! It is very exciting to me. I haven't gone to see him yet as I have a sore throat. Also a symptom of mono.

5. I went to an awesome training last night for foster care. Learned about emotional coaching. Loved it. Am using it already. Has changed how I deal with my kids anger and sadness. Every parent should take it.

6. The birth mom of my 2 boys is in jail again. Will stay there for a year maybe from what I hear. The debate is if they should give the father reunification. ( for the baby). i hope not

7. Wyatt is now over 11 lbs. he is adorable and I worship him.

8. Byran wants to buy a 15 seater van. yea, fun. I'm rolling my eyes.

9. I have finally discovered at 37 years old that no one in my family gets me. I mean really gets me. It makes me sad.

10. I feel like this has been one of the hardest years of my life. I am actually glad it is coming to an end. I have had a lot of trials and it will feel good to start a new year out fresh. I have learned so much but I wouldn't want to do it again!

11. I am so glad that I play World of Warcraft. It is such a stress reliever for me. I can just zone out for a bit. I never play when the kids are home though. I like to be able to focus on them for the time they are here before bedtime. I play during nap time. Thank heavens for nap time. I have made so many great friends on the game.

12. I have stopped going to clogging. I am too tired at that time of day. 8pm. I usually go to bed at about 8:30pm because I am too tired to stay awake. I take long baths after the kids leave for school and it has been hard to get anything done. It"s not depression, it's different. I hope I figure it out.

13. Thank heavens for good friends who understand me. What I would do without them, I don't know.

14.I sure adore my man. He has been so good to me. It is good to have him home. He was gone for 5 days hunting. That was hard. I forgot a lot of things like the mite medicine in the dogs ears, I forgot feedings, thank heavens Jake remembered those poor animals outside. I forgot appointments and a million other little things. Good thing I have smart kids!

15. That's all for now folks. Thanks for reading. Sorry I haven't been around for a while. It looks like no one has! Hope to see you writing! bye.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!!!!

I love Halloween! It has to be one of my favorite holidays ever! I love to dress up and the whole shebang!

Last Saturday night I went to a haunted house with a friend of mine and it was so much fun! I love that sort of thing.

Last night we took the kids to a corn maze for family night. That was exhausting! It took forever to find our way out. The boys kept hiding trying to scare us and Heidi got tired and wanted to be carried!

I carried the baby in my front pack and that 10 pounds sure got heavy by the time we left! But it was fun and the kids will remember it!

After we got home, I took the boys to the haunted house I had gone to. It wasn't even scary at all for me or Jake. It did freak out Seth a little but he had fun I was so tired and didn't really want to go but I knew the boys would love it and I wanted to make some fun memories and I couldn't get Bry to do it.

Tomorrow we will all meet the cousins at Grandma's house, have dinner and go trick or treating in her neighborhood. She has a great one except more and more, people aren't passing out candy and are just doing the trunk or treat thing. To be honest, I don't like the trunk or treat. It takes all the found out of it. Yea, yea, I know it's safer etc... but I don't like it.

I loved trick or treating in my old neighborhood. We knew everyone who lived there and I went until I was 17! Yes, it's true. Loved it!

So, today we will make cookies and get out costumes and get ready for the big day! Hope your is as wonderful as I intend mine to be!

The Man Rules

I got this as an e-mail. Loved it! laughed clear through. thought you'd enjoy it too.

The Man Rules­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down

Finally , the guys' side of the story. ( I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear " the rules"From the female side.

Now here are the rules from the male side.

These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered "1 "
ON PURPOSE!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.


1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.


1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball
or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Pass this to as many men as you can -to give them a laugh.

Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh.

Who loves "the Rock"?

I just watched the movie "Grid Iron Gang". My movie review would be very positive. I love those inspirational stories. They always seem to involve foot ball. Have you noticed that? I think it was a true story. They made it sound that way but I have been wrong before.

I do have to say that I LOVE "the Rock". That man makes me melt just to look at him. There is something about him, and I have always felt that way. I love to watch his movies just to watch him! Now, I don't feel too bad about it. I have never felt guilty noticing beautiful people. I have eyes for heavens sake. I especially like black men. I love the way they are built and move and look.

Bryan loves oriental women. I had no idea about that until a few years ago. Now we tease each other because neither of us resembles those nationalities.

Now, the Rock is a mix. I think I heard he's part Samoan, part causation (?) and part black. It is a beautiful mixture. He is physically perfect in every way in my eyes! Anyway, the thing I really like is that he seems like such a good man on the inside too.

Kind of like Arnold Swartzenager (sp?). A big hulk of a man, making action moves who starts doing family movies. I love that. I love the action movies too but I really love the inspiration these icons can be if they let themselves.

I love to see people who are a great influence on others, especially the youth, using that to be a good example. Now I mean a good example as far as the world goes. The world need noticeable, famous people out there doing the right things. It is watched and it is noticed.

I hope and pray that there will continue to be more and more of those people out there. Maybe we all can be.

This movie has swearing that I wouldn't let my kids see. It's rated pg-13, so be careful of who you let watch it but I recommend it.

We have a turkey. She has become a pet to us . All the animals like her and she follows you around during feeding time. She is huge and so sweet.

The funny thing is, I usually don't do the feeding. Bry does. I used to be out with the animals a lot more than I do now. I don't know why, I just don't go out much. But Bry and Jake are gone for the weekend hunting so I HAVE to do it.

She came up to me this morning calling out wanting to eat. I petted her all over and she followed me back to her bowl and stood there waiting just like the dogs do! It was so funny to me!

The animals are peaceful and I always feel bad in the winter that they can't come inside. I hate it that it is cold and wintry for them.

I may not spend much time with them but I do love them and I really enjoy what they give us humans. Their lives are so simple. So basic. Eat, poop, lay eggs, chase birds, eat bugs, graze. You know. Simple. Thank heavens for simple things.

They keep me balanced and remind me to be happy and to enjoy the sunset. You know?

What a workout!! I just got home from my clogging class. What fun! It is at 8 pm every Tues and I have to be honest, I am so tired by the end of the day that I just dread that class!! But once I get there, it is so much fun that I love it.

It brings on a sweat that would surprise you and by the end I feel like I am all thumbs....on my feet. Plus my shoes need to be broken in but dang, I feel good. It bothers my foot a little but the chiropractor says I need to be putting a little stress on it every week to keep the muscles strong.

So, anyway, there you have it. My new talent! HA! Who would have thought. Me, a dancer!

Splurge/Save meme

"10 things I splurge on, 10 things I save on" meme

OK, this is a toughie. If I were my little sister, it would be easier! Let's see....I splurge on...

Winder dairy. I love their milk. The skim tastes like 2%. I love their bread too. . I love good food. The problem is that I don't love to cook. I never look at prices of food. I get what I really want. Except on cold cereal. I do price that stuff.

I splurge on shoes. I don't even bat an eye spending a hundred bucks on shoes. I don't have a lot of pairs, but I do have nice ones! lol

Makeup. I do use Mary Kay, because I used to sell it. Although I seldom wear makeup any more. I'm too d@$& lazy.


On trips. When I get them. I feel you should take plenty of money to really have fun. What is the point of going if you can't enjoy it because you don't have the money?

Restaurants. I love to eat out. I would eat out for every meal if I could. It doesn't bother me a bit to go out to eat when there is food at home!

Movies... and I always get popcorn. I used to date a guy who would never buy it because he thought it was too expensive. He is also the same guy who would conveniently forget his wallet on dates and I would have to pay. I don't know why it took me so long to figure out what a dud he was.

TV. I get the dish. I like having variety. We also get Comcast high speed internet. That is something I could never live without now.

My new baby. I have spent a lot of money on him and he isn't even officially mine yet. But I don't want to miss out on the whole experience just because I don't know if we will keep him. I really regret that with Gabe. With Wyatt, we have named him, bought lots of cute clothes, I got his portraits taken last week, and am definitely letting my feelings run wild with him.

That is all I can think of with splurging.

Saving is easy. I am married to the thriftiest man alive. We never have bought a new car and never will. I shop at Walmart most of the time or my new favorite, Bukoos. We save on yard work stuff by never doing it!!

I buy the cheapest cold cereal I can. My kids love to snack on it and it is gone too fast to spend a fortune.

Gasoline. I buy at Maverick or Flying J.

Gads. It's hard to think of what I save on!!! There isn't much!!! I like things to be fast and convenient and that usually means more expensive!

I tag anyone who reads this!!!!

Idiot tube meme

1. What TV show have you seen every episode of?
I would have to say Mash. Loved that one. That show made my laugh and cry. There were stories that to make you wet your pants and other to brake your heart.

2. What show makes you laugh until you cry? I would say Seinfeld. Loved that one too. That is one show I could watch again and again.

3. What show do you wish had not been canceled?
American Super Heroes. That was a personal favorite as a kid. Do you remember that one? "Wonder twin powers....... activate!....form of....shape of...." Where did all those great role model cartoons go? Why do we have to watch Pokemon and those other stupid shows now? Mind you, my kids don't get too. I don't like those cartoons.

4. What show do you wish WOULD be canceled?
I think I would get hate mail if I were honest but I guess I will be brave. I think that most HBO series should go, I think Desperate Housewives is smutty. I used to watch it but it got to the point where I just couldn't take their stupidity, backbiting and selfishness anymore. I really don't think those kinds of shows are that entertaining. Please, no comments on this one.

5. Who is your favorite TV character, either past or present? There is more than one. I can't just pick one. Andy Griffith is a go as S'mee pointed out. The first one to come to my mind would be Bill Cosby. Through out television history, hasn't Bill been there? From Fat Albert to the Cosby show. Such a funny, honest, good man. Where have these men gone? Why don't we have shows on that these men would star in anymore. Or at least men LIKE them.

I honestly don't watch much tv anymore. I do like the show Heros and House but off the rest of the top of my head, nothing comes to mind!!

I tag, Lisa, Yolanda, Charlotte, Jeri, Jenny, and anyone else who wants to do it! I stole it from s'mee!!!

Life of Pi

I just finished one of the most fascinating book I have ever read. If you haven't read it, do so. It has tidbits about life that will make you think, and then think, and think some more. You will keep thinking about it even weeks after you've finished it, as my sister told me.

It's true. The twist at the end makes you question everything you have read so far and ask yourself, "What was real?" Which part was true?

They don't tell you. It is something you have to decide for yourself.

Isn't that so indicative of life? Isn't that what we do everyday? Decide what we want to believe? What we choose to think is true? What do we do in the face of adversity? Do we give up or keep on plugging?

Do we make up a fantasy that we believe is true and refuse to ever deny or is it really real? Is it just our mind trying to make sense of a difficult situation so that we would cling to anything rather than admit to ourselves what has really happened to us?

I do think we do that. Some of us. Others will never believe our story. It is too fantastic to believe.

Honestly, is makes me think of Joseph Smith. His story is too fantastic to believe.....almost. How is it possible to trust someone with such a wild story? Who in their right mind would? You can't prove it. There is no conclusive, hard evidence but his word. Do we tell him to make up a different story that people would like better? That is was those men at the end wanted Pi to do.

In the end, you choose what you want to choose. You stick to you guns. Either believe in God or don't believe in God. Don't be one of those fence sitters that never chooses a side. Don't sentence yourself to a life of indecision. No more debating, no more arguing the point. Just choose for heavens sake. That is one of the lessons that really made me think in this book.

In the end, I have to say I loved it. I learned things that I will never be able to put into words. I made me love life even more than I did before.

Aaarrrrggg!

It has been an extremely difficult week. It sounds like that feeling is going around. I have never felt like I had a lot of stress in my life because really, I get to be home, I don't have a hard schedual or deadlines etc.....

But I got to thinking about that test you can take to see what level of stress you have. You answer questions like. Have you recently moved, had a death, had a birth etc.....

I have realized, that I do actually have a little stress in my life. 5 kids is enough to scare most people! NEVER getting enough sleep. That one is the real clincher because I can handle anything if I have had enough sleep. Getting a new baby that I may or may not get to keep is a constant stress on my mind. One that won't go away until I know for sure.

I have a constant feeling of guilt about my relationship with Gabe. I feel like we have never really bonded. I get more impatient and irritated with him than any of the other kids. Potty training goes with that plus all the crap he gets into. Like a couple of days ago when he opened 9 cans of purple grape juice all over downstairs. It sounds like I don't watch him but that is not true. I have taken to tying him to my bed! He never stops getting in to things. He colored with marker on Heidi's bed. I don't know where he found a marker but the older kids leave things laying around. Anyway, these things don't help the bonding much either. No body can understand my frustration with him. They all make comments like "but he is so cute and so sweet and so happy all the time". All those things are true but the thing that does validate my feelings is when my sister came to stay, she said those things, but by the times she left, she could understand some of my frustrations with Gabe!! Yea! It's not just me! I'm not really the terrible mother I feel like I am most of the time!

We run our own business which has it's own set of ups and downs. I want to do things a certain way and Bryan wants to do it differently. Who wins? I'd like to say ME!! But that is not always the case.

I picked this picture to put up because it makes me feel peace. It looks like Ireland would look to me. It calms me and helps me to remember that no matter what happens in this life, the world goes on around me.

We all have our challenges. Some people have bigger ones than me and I am grateful I don't have theirs. Thank heavens for my little bag of troubles. If I get enough sleep, I can handle them.

So there you have it. That is why I haven't written for so long. I am just too tired!! But maybe it will get better soon!

You Are Cheesecake

Rich, sweet, and simply perfect. You're not boring - you're just the best!

What Dessert Are You Most Like?

Latest update. Today, I am discouraged. I just don't know if I want to keep doing this nursing. I have had a really hard time the last 3 days.

My nipples hurt almost unbearably, and I can't nurse as often and as much as he wants to eat. I don't know if I should keep going or stop. I wonder if he isn't getting enough of the ariola (sp?) in his mouth but he WILL NOT open it bigger. If babies don't take in enough of you, you will get sores and it will hurt more.

I had a friend who had to bottle feel because her baby's mouth was too small to open big enough. Most babies who are bottle fed have a really hard time going to the breast and a lot of breastfed babies who are started on a bottle wean themselves from the breast. Bottles are just easier to suck on.

So, here I am. So discouraged. Bry thinks I should quit and just bottle feed. He sees how sore I am. I think I will call this lady I talked to before to find out how long it took for her and if she was this sore etc.... I'll let you know what I decide.

Update

I have nothing new really to write about. The nursing is coming along. Little by little the milk is building up and feeling less sore.

Wyatt is so funny. He is used to having a stiff nipple shoved into his mouth. Now, he acts like he is being teased with it being brushed against him but never shoved in! He has to relearn how to do it by going after it which is new to him. He is getting it though and it gets better every day. I love it. I had forgotten what a beautiful experience it is.

People who have a choice and choose not to nurse are really missing out. I have been drilling my boys about it. I tell them to make sure their wives nurse! So many women don't want to ruin their boobs. The Lady who I talked to who adopted 5 and nursed them all just got her first grandchild. He daughter in law isn't going to nurse for that reason. Imagine how she feels about that!

Anyway, if there is a way, breast is best.

I had forgotten how painful it was to start nursing.

I received my little "Lact-Aid" contraption and it is working. We both get a little frustrated though because it is hard to get the nipple and little tube in his mouth at the same time. And to get as much of the nipple area as possible so it doesn't hurt as much. It is exhausting but it is working. My milk is starting to come in. That was fast. Hopefully it will continue quickly to fill up more.

So, we are going to a family party today. I will see my sister in law's new baby they have adopted. A little new born girl. In a couple of months, my little sister will have her baby. How fun. I love it that there will be cousins to grow up with.

Gabe already loves going to her house to play with her son who is his same age. He cries when he has to come home. I can't decide if that is good or not!

I was supposed to go running today but I am too tired. It was a really hard night.

My Piano

The most wonderful thing happened for me this weekend. I had my old piano's keys redone.

The ivories were falling off and it looked and felt terrible. I hadn't played in a long time. It just didn't attract me. I hated how it felt.

This piano has a long history. I feel very blessed to have it. It belonged to my great great aunt originally. She gave it to my Grandma which caused a big fight in her family but she felt that it was the right thing to do. My gram gave all her kids lessons on it and then gave it to my mom.

Oh I forgot to mention. This is a very heavy old upright piano. My Great great aunt's house caught on fire once and she pushed it out of her house by herself to save it. It was the only thing she saved.

Anyway, my Mom then gave it to me. I was a music major, my older sisters had bought pianos when they had married and she could see that I was the most committed to music at the time.

I had it in my room for a long time. It took 5 big Samoan men to carry it up the stairs out of the house when I got married. It has never had to have any strings replaced and it has it's original soundboard in perfect condition. It has a tone to die for. It is no longer a very pretty piano as for as looks go but you'd be hard pressed to find one that sounds as good.

About 5 years ago I had the hammers sanded down so now they sound like they did when they were new. Saturday, I had the ivory redone. It's not real ivory of course. The old ones were though and I kept a few for sentimental reasons, but it looks beautiful.

I can't stop playing it. I love to play. I have given myself a new piano lesson and the sweetest thing of all is this....

Every night, when we put Heidi to bed, she asks Bry to watch a "mobie" (movie) in the other room until she falls asleep. She gets scared all by herself. Last night when I put her to bed, She asked me, "Will you play the piano in the other room?" She said it so sweet. I had played the piano for the last 2 nights just for my own enjoyment after she had gone to bed. It brought tears to my eyes. Bryan has been replaced. It made me so happy that she would rather listen to the piano than the tv. Who wouldn't?

My parents used to love to lay in bed and listen to me practice late at night. At least that was what my mom told me!

So, I love my "new" piano. It is my baby even still and I love to see it taken care of. It kills me to see people mistreat musical instruments. For me, they have souls and know when they aren't loved! Sounds weird I know, but I am a little weird. Just ask Lisa!

I have not been running. In fact, it has been the whole summer that I have not run. I had ordered some new insoles that would keep my left heel from leaning, thus keeping my foot from hurting so bad.

There were problems and the ones I got were wrong, had to wait for them to make new ones, then they were on back order yada yada yada.

So they finally came. I think they do help but I have found a bunch a little knots over that area of my foot that don't want to leave. It is the tendons there now that I have to train or fix. SO.......I ran a mile on Sat. No, let me clarify, I ran the first half and walked the last half. It felt pretty good.

Today, I did a mile again and it was super hard. I couldn't wait for it to be over. It was an eye opener. It can be so hard to start over. The foot is bothering me a little but not bad. I put ice on it and that helps. I think if I keep icing it and rubbing out those knots that it will get better. Let's hope.

So, We have chosen a name for our baby that we finally agree on. It has been quite the challenge because Bry only likes stupid names!! Not to be rude but it is true. Ask Lisa. So anyway, We have both agreed on "Wyatt". It is the first name that has felt like it fits him. Bry loves it because it is a cowboy name. I don't know why I like it because I didn't used to. It has grown on me.

So, there it is. It is starting out to be a good day! Hope yours is pretty great too!

O.K., here's what's new for me. I have decided to nurse my new little bundle of fun. I always wished I had with Gabe. I've talked to doctors and others about it and they all look at me like I am an idiot.

I admit to falling prey to their opinions. Yet there was always that side that wished. I went to my chiropractor yesterday. I just adore him. Anyway, he asked if I were thinking of that because he has another patient who adopted 5 kids and breast fed them all!!!

He gave me her number and I called her this morning. She used the Lact-Aid method. It is a little tube that goes into their mouth along with your nipple so they are getting their formula until your milk comes in. She said hers always came in withing about a week.

So, I am going to try it. I always loved nursing. I also think at this time of year, when he really needs the antibodies, he deserves to be getting them. It is not his fault that his birth mom screwed up. She was actually intending to breast feed. I really feel he deserves to be as healthy as possible. Anyway, it doesn't hurt to try.

So, If any of you out there have negative opinions about this, I don't want to hear it. On the other hand, if you want to be encouraging and supportive, feel free to say so!

THIS WAS FUN. I LOVED THIS BOOK AND I DON'T MIND BEING COMPARED TO ESME. Which Twilight novel character are you?

You're Esme Cullen - Your maternal instinct to take care of people and be kind draw people towards you. You're compassionate and loving, yet firm when you need to be. You appreciate hard work and value the beautiful results of your dedication to any project. Take this quiz! Quizilla | Join | Make A Quiz | More Quizzes | Grab Code

New Fun MEME

Funny MEME I stole from Lisa, who stole it from Chronicler.....

1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet & current car),
Tike villager

2.YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (fave ice cream flavor, favorite cookie),
Vanilla chip

3. YOUR “FLY Guy/Girl” NAME: (first initial of first name, first three letters of your last name) M-Cun

4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal),
Lavender pony

5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born),
Judith Eugene

6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first),
Cun-me (that's bad)

7. SUPERHERO NAME: (”The” + 2nd favorite color, favorite drink),
The Green Water

8. NASCAR NAME: (the first names of your grandfathers),
Joseph Raymond

9. STRIPPER NAME: ( the name of your favorite perfume/cologne/scent, favorite candy),
G Symphony (yea, I like that one)

10.WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother’s & father’s middle names ),
Lee Don

11. TV WEATHER ANCHOR NAME: (Your 5th grade teacher’s last name, a major city that starts with the same letter),
Flegal Fillmore

12. SPY NAME: (your favorite season/holiday, flower).
Autumn Rose

13. CARTOON NAME: (favorite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing right now + “ie” or “y”)
watermelon underpants (i'm related to squarepants)

14. HIPPY NAME: (What you ate for breakfast, your favorite tree),

Mcmuffin Pine

15. YOUR ROCKSTAR TOUR NAME: (”The” + Your fave hobby/craft, fave weather element + “Tour”),
The Warcraft Thunder Tour

Now this was fun!

A new kid on the block

I want to introduce my sweet niece who I adore! Her name is Jennifer! She is on "My Space" which I am trying to figure out how to use so I can communicate with her. It is a little different than blogspot but I added her to my blog roll. You ought to check out her page. It is absolutley beautiful! I would love a page like hers!

She is married, has 2 little girls and just moved to Oklahoma. Her husband was just stationed there at the military prison. He is a prison guard there.

Anyway, I adore her and want to give her a warm welcome to the blogging world. If you want to post a comment, it will say where that is available on the right side of her page. It was a little tricky for me but I don' t get enough sleep!
Jenny's space

Peach Days

This is one of the best times of the year. Peaches, among other fruits are falling off the trees.

Northern Utah, mainly Box Elder County, is famous for Peach days. It is a 3 day celebration with booths, rides, food, a car show (that we never miss) and above all, peach cobbler!

It is the best peach cobbler you will ever eat.

The day started out with the parade. The kids rode on a little cart with our adopted grandpa (a man in our ward who we love) and me, my sister, nephew and baby watched. I sat with Lisa for a while too as she was in the shade and we weren't.

It was a 2 1/2 hour parade as usual. My favorite part is watching the runners who are finishing the 10k run past before the parade starts. That part actually brings tears to my eyes. I wish I could do it. Maybe next year.

That evening, Bry and I went on our date night to Peach Days. I ate a Navajo taco and of course, peach cobbler which had a wonderful dip of vanilla ice cream on top. WAY fattening but irresistible. You can't go to Peach Days and not have cobbler. I couldn't even finish mine! But it was SO tasty and hot with that cold ice cream on top. My mouth waters now just thinking of it.

We saw Gus's Grandma there with his older brother who is being taken care of by her son and daughter in law. They would love to adopt their nephew but who knows?

All in all, it was so much fun and a great date! I am now sad that it is over.

I wonder if they will keep celebrating peach days when there are no more orchards that grow peaches. It is an issue that is killing me. These old farmers are dying and their kids just want the money from the property. More and more orchards are being hewn down. Where do people think our food in the stores comes from? Don't people realize if we wipe out corn fields, orchards, and other food sources, that it won't just appear of the grocery shelf miraculously? I hate every field I drive by that is blue staked. I am disgusted by it. My husband would give anything to be a farmer if we had the money to buy the land, but here in Honeyville, a 5 acre lots is going for over 200 thousand.

Life is not fair. But let me tell you, this is why you need a food storage. We are paving paradise and putting up parking lots!