Friday, August 29, 2008

News from the mermaid!

I swam again this morning and I went to the Tremonton pool. I have to say, I did like it better. There were only 5 other people there as compared to the Brigham pool which had a bit more than that.

The water was warm and smooth and it felt so good to glide through it. I am improving. I used to be the kind of swimmer who couldn't stand to have water in her nose and I am completely cured of that!

Plus, I have a tendency to only want to breath on the left side when I do free style. It feels better. Natural. Comfortable. But it isn't good to be stuck having to do something in only one way. It makes you a prisoner. In more things than just swimming. So I practiced breathing on the right side. It was tough at first. I thought I would drown. I kept breathing in water because I didn't tilt enough but I finally got it. I got to the point where I would do the left side for one lap and the right for a lap. THAT IS HUGE PROGRESS FOR ME!!!! I do still have to rest after each lap. Embarrassing.

But this is huge. First of all, I am making myself get up and get to the pool by 5 am!!! I have to go that early if I want to be home to get my kids ready for school and do Heidi's hair and breakfast etc...., then I drive 11 miles, which is big because I tend to want to do things the easy way and driving in the early morning, in the dark when I'd rather be in bed is big.

Then I let water in my nose as I swim laps! I let people see me in a swim suit, which I don't think is a pretty sight! So all in all, I AM WAY OUT OF MY COMFORT ZONE!!!

I highly recommend it! Getting out of your comfort zone is uncomfortable! But so healthy in every way!

Thursday, August 28, 2008

For Gram

I have been sitting here all day, typing my Grandmother's poetry into my computer. I'm only half done. Maybe.

I have never read all through her poetry and it is wonderful. I want to get it published into a book., It would mean so much to her decedents. She had written poems for almost everyone! I don't think I even have them all. She would doodle on anything and it would come out a beautiful poem.

Half the stuff she wrote in pencil! She wrote quite a few poems about World war Two as her only son was serving. They are so heartfelt.

Anyway, I am exhausted! So I'll write more tomorrow.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Swimming again

I swam laps this morning for the first time in a year. I have always loved to swim. The peaceful quiet is therapeutic as well as athletic.

The problem now is that I am totally out of shape and have to breathe faster than I can swim! The thing is, if you breath while under water, you die. So I mostly did the backstroke. I could do free style about halfway across and then I would need to flip over.

I felt dead after only swimming for a half hour. My endurance needs some work but I do have to say, Lisa would be proud. I did not use nose plugs.

I have had issues with water in my nose my whole life. As a child, I had to have private swim lessons as I was so afraid of the water. I had almost drowned when I was four and had never been able to learn much in the class setting. During one lesson, my teacher praised me and mentioned the fact "that I didn't even plug my nose". From that day on, I noticed it and needed to plug it. Stupid huh? I've always thought so.

So, this morning, I got up and got there at 5 am. Yes, you read right. 5 AM!!!!! I swam for a half our and crawled back home to get the kids off to school. It feels so good to get so much done early but I'm tired now.

My question is this. Which pool should I go to? I have the option of two. I can go to the Natatorium in Brigham which is 8.5 miles away and always crowded. Or I can go to the Nat in Tremonton which is 11 miles away and usually never crowded. Is 5 miles saved round trip worth it? I feel self conscience as it is because I'm a beginner but I hate to spend more in gas. Bry said he'd go where it was less crowded. What a pain. I just need a pool in my back yard!

Monday, August 25, 2008

The First day of school

It's the first day of school. It seems like it was the first day of school of last year, was just a month ago! I can still remember sitting here in this spot writing about that first day of school. Weird.

Jake is in 7th now, Seth is in 3rd and Heidi is in 1st. I do have to admit. I LOVE IT!!! I love having my days back already and it's only 8:43 am! I can get my house clean in the morning and do my things in peace and quiet.

Now don't get me wrong. I love the summer time and have the kids home, but by the end of August, I am ready for them to go back.

My goal this year is to stay organized and steady. I tend to get excited about new goals for about 2 weeks, then fizzle out. I want to be more consistent this time.

So, so far, I have showered, cleaned my room, vacuumed the upstairs, fed Wyatt and put him to bed, typed a bid and faxed it and blow dried my hair. Pretty good huh?

So there it is. I still need to spend some time in each bathroom. Go to Gabe's therapist for the next level/step in his Reactive/attachment therapy, buy more formula, finish about a million batches of laundry, make dinner and all that other fun mother stuff!

Wish me luck!

Thursday, August 21, 2008

Our Day

I got our temple pictures back last night from my neice. They turned out great! What a wonderful day it was. We sure deserved an oasis from worries that day.

We have gone through a couple big things this year that were unbelievably stressful. Thank heavens for days like this.

Good News

We had another CT scan done yesterday at University Hospital. The results say that the mass is getting smaller. WOOO HOOO!

Now I don't know if it was always just pneumonia, or if we had a miracle but it doesn't matter. God has given us the gift of a second chance at life.

He gave us an experience that puts our mortality into perspective. Too often, we go through life thinking bad things only happen to other people. This has taught us that we want to spend more time doing things we enjoy. Bryan has realized that the things he has always wanted to do, and put off, need to be done before it really is too late.

The doctor wants to see him again in 6 weeks to make sure it's all gone but for now, we are celebrating.

I guess it is better to be safe than sorry, but doctors can really scare the pants off you. Just the words, "mass in you lung" is enough to send you reeling but wow, I'm glad it is ending for now.

Now we just wait for Bry to get over the pneumonia and feel good enough to work again. Halleluia!!!!!

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Quick note

Hey all. Just a quick note to let you know we are heading out this morning for the U of U hospital to get Bry checked out.

Will let you all know how it goes!

Thank you so much for your prayers and emails. THey mean the world to us.

Friday, August 15, 2008

Bad news

I went to see "Mama Mia" by myself today. I just wanted some time alone. It was a great movie with fabulous music and I cried clear through it.

I was surrounded by geriatric couples who never stopped talking out loud. If I would have been in a better mood, it would have made me laugh. Seriously, there were 4 or 5 elderly couples sitting in a circle around me.

There I sat, eating popcorn with too much butter, knowing it would make me sick and I ate it anyway. I also tried to drown my sorrow with chocolate. That usually helps but not this time.

I cried the whole way home too which I suppose could have caused an accident but I did manage to make it safely.

Our doctors appt. this morning was what we expected but not what we hoped. There is some sort of mass in his lung, it looks bad but they aren't sure what it is. They are trying to get him in at University Hospital ASAP to have a bronchoscope done. That is were they go in, look around and get a biopsy.

Bryan's dad smoked for 20 years. The whole time he lived at home. Bry was also a sandblaster in his younger years and has also worked with asbestos. So who know what has caused this. The doc said not to jump to conclusions but to be prepared because it looks bad. He was very caring and concerned and we really like him but he was direct.

We are both pretty sad today. I am trying not to guess or assume the worst about it but just imagine what you'd be thinking if this happened in your life. It's impossible to not imagine the worst or to not dwell on it. At least a little bit.

The doc also told us to get a blessing and that he had seen MANY miracles happen because of blessings. We are having a fast with our friends and family on Sunday if any of you want to join in.

Thank you for your concern and care. It means a lot to me.

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Oh, Goodness. What a week. Bry has gotten sicker and sicker so we went to our doctor AGAIN, and to make a long story short, he has pneumonia. We figured that was all there was to it, got our anti-biotic and came home to rest.

This morning the doctor called and said they'd gotten the test results of his CT scan back and that it looks like there is a mass there in his lung besides the pneumonia. Nice. It's always pleasant to have good news.

Plus, why didn't they say that to us yesterday at the ER when we got the CT scan and they read it there? Who knows?

I know doctors are just people like you and me and are infallible but it is so frustrating for them not to just KNOW!

So, we are supposed to go in tomorrow and talk about it, set up an appt. with a pulmonary specialist and get this figured out. It's going to be a great day. I hope it turns out to be nothing. Our friend and neighbor down the road was just diagnosed with lung cancer. He's only 35. It is so sad.

Well, there you have it. That's what we have been up to. I'll let you know what we find out.

Monday, August 11, 2008

The Story

I have a new favorite artist. Brandi Carlile. I am in love with her voice. I LOVE the song she sings on the new GM commercial so I found her and bought the album. The song I love, and actually, I love them all since I've heard them on her album, is called....


♪♫ ♪♫ Here are the lyrics... ♪♫ ♪♫

All of these lines across my face
Tell you the story of who I am.
So many stories of where I've been
And how I got to where I am,
But these stories don't mean anything,
When you've got no one to tell them to.
It's true... I was made for you.

I climbed across the mountain tops,
Swam all across the ocean blue.
I crossed all the lines and I broke all the rules,
But baby I broke them all for you.
Oh, because even when I was flat broke,
You made me feel like a million bucks.
You do and I was made for you.

You see the smile that's on my mouth.
It's hiding the words that don't come out,
And all of my friends who think that I'm blessed.
They don't know my head is a mess.
No, they don't know who I really am,
And they don't know what I've been through like you do,
And I was made for you.

All of these lines across my face
Tell you the story of who I am.
So many stories of where I've been
And how I got to where I am.
But these stories don't mean anything,
When you've got no one to tell them to.
It's true... I was made for you.

I would have put the music on but, alas, I am computer illiterate! I don't know how to do that and make it work so you get the title, the lyrics and the composer! Go look it up! You'll love it

Sunday, August 10, 2008

Olympics 2008

Is there a more exciting time for our world than right now? Our whole planet has come together with a common goal. I love the Olympics!

On Friday night, I had all my little kiddies sitting around me, a big bowl of buttery popcorn on our laps, enjoying one of the most magnificent shows they would ever see.

Like the rest of the world, I have never seen an open quite like it. What precision! It was so amazing and then to realize that people were in those boxes! I heard that they had been practicing those box movements for months and had NEVER gotten it completely right until the night of the performance!

I watched Michael Phelps take his first Gold and the look on his face made it a priceless moment. I find myself glued to the TV most of the day! I don't want to miss a thing!

I watched gymnastics yesterday and wow! How incredible these athletes are. I watched the men's volleyball and how devastated they were to lose their match. I loved the swimming or course and never knew that Michael Phelps had started training at 11! I loved watching his mother during his race! I was practically out of my seat myself, cheering him on!

I plan on seeing as much of the competitions as I can and I want my kids to watch too. These games are important and I want my kids to feel that. They have watched with me most of the time and they find themselves just as excited as me!


Friday, August 08, 2008

I finished Stephanie Meyer's new book! And I have to say, I loved it. She is a brilliant writer.

Being an aspiring writer myself, It's hard not to see the brilliance and creativity that she uses. It's also hard to not let my ego take over and say that there is no way I could every compete with her level of writing.

How does she do it?

Anyway, Loved it. Read it in 3 days. Luckily I was sick so I had a good excuse to just to lay in bed and read.

I have joined a writing group. In fact, I'm joining 2 different writing groups. I love it and found out that you can enter either a poem, essay, or short story in the Peach Days writing competition.

So I woke up at 5:30am the next morning and couldn't go back to sleep. I got up, and wrote for an hour and a half. The short story can only be 2000 words or shorter. Mine is exactly 2000 words!!

I'll let you know what happens. The winner "gets" to read his/her piece in front of everyone! WOoo Hoooo!

I had a friend proof it for me and she said it made her cry. It made me cry as I wrote it so that is a good sign right? By the way, It's called "The Marathon".

Since I can't run myself, I can dream and write about it.

If I win, I will post it.

Saturday, August 02, 2008

It has been such a nice day. I love the ones that are mellow and relaxing. It was just me, Heidi, Gabe and Wyatt.

We played games, painted our toenails, made oatmeal cookies, and watched Homeward Bound. It still makes cry every time I see it. In fact, I cry more the older I get!

Jake is in South Dakota with cousins, Seth went with Bry to look at some jobs and the rest of us stayed home.

I also worked on my book I am writing. It is so much fun and you know, I think it's pretty good. But it doesn't really matter what I think. It's what others think. Hopefully someone will want to publish it!

I would put snatches of it here on my blog but I don't want anyone to steal my idea! lol Is that paranoid or what?

Anyway, just thought I would say hi!