Saturday, December 30, 2006
In the time that has gone by since we got her, she has improved immensely. She likes to be with me the most. She will lay at my feet when I am on the computer or next to my bed if I am there if I don't invite her up.
She seldom has accidents in the house but that is because I don't give her to opportunity. She will deliver the 3rd week of Jan. How fun! We will be having "Schmorkies". A mix of a pure bred Shi Tzu and a Yorkie/Maltese mix. How cute. I found out that a lot of people prefer mixes. They have fewer health problems, allergies and seem heartier. They go for about $400.00 on the Internet!!
Since we had Cookie shaved, she has grown out very fluffy and cute. What an adorable little companion. I have started to watch the show, "Dog Whisperer". What a fascinating show and I have started to implement what I have learned and it has worked wonders! It's on the national geographic channel.
Well folks. I'll let you know!
Monday, December 25, 2006
Bry cleaned her up, I tore her sheets off and she got in bed with us. A half hour later, she needed to throw up again! Then, the kids wanted to get up at 5:30! No way! We told them to go back to bed. They did get up again at 6:30 and we let them stay up.
The gifts were a hit and we had so much fun opening them. Bry got me a sewing machine! I have wanted one for a very long time. My brother who is staying with us brought me beautiful, hand crafted silver earrings from Hawaii where he lives. Of course there were the lotions and bath stuff that I love. All in lavender. My favorite.
They are all watching Cars. The movie my brother bought the kids and the turkey is in the oven. It smells so good. I made homemade stuffing just like my mom always did. It smells heavenly. I still have to make a few other things to go with dinner but not until later. I did make pumpkin pies with Yolanda's recipe and they turned out fabulous! Except for the BLACK edges! I forgot to cover them with tinfoil! I couldn't believe it! I wanted it to be perfect! They still taste great though. We just can't eat the top edge.
Well, I guess that is all for now! It will be a wonderful day and if anything significant happens, i'll let you know!
Thursday, December 21, 2006
This is what it is supposed to look like the week of Christmas! The people in Colorado are pretty lucky to be having a white one.
Those of us here in BFE, Utah are not so lucky. YET!!! This December, it is a beautiful, dead, brown outside. Cold enough to make it unpleasant but not cold enough to wear heavy artillery.
I have so many memories of beautiful, snowy Decembers. I love the snow for one month and then I am ready for Florida, but Christmas just isn't Christmas without it.
My sister and I would wrap baggies on our doll's feet to go out to play in the snow. I remember how the dogs in the back yard would make paths in the deep snow to where they wanted to go. My sister had her big dog back there once who pounced on me, pinned me down in the trench and proceeded to lick my face. I was screaming for help. Now remember, I am only about 11 or 12 here. My older sister came out, saw me, laughed and went back inside. She was sadistic back then. I don't remember who saved me but I was scarred for life.
Some of my best memories were of family nights when we would go to Hannah Holbrook Elementary as a family to slide down the hill. I was huge and steep and SO MUCH FUN!! We would go home freezing. My little sisters and I would get into the tub together and it would hurt so bad while our skin thawed out. My Dad always hated activities like this but every once in a while, Mom would talk him into it.
I love the winter time for short periods. It is a time for children. A magical world of wonder. May we all experience a white Christmas this year! Merry Christmas!
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
Anyway, I did it in blue. Blue is such a soothing color for me. IT is in two tones. A light blue and then a slightly darker blue on the wall with the window. I rearranged a little and it seems like there is so much more room in this little space of mine. I have to have my computer desk in here because there are only 2 phone jacks in the whole upstairs!! One in the kitchen and one in my room! How stupid, I know, but I didn't build it!
I love to organize and I threw a lot away and am giving a lot to the DI. I love a clean, immaculate room. I love neatness and it is so unusual in my house! My poor hubby. I've put him to work putting on the base boards. He's out there now nailing away. I did sand and paint them though.
I want it to be beautiful for Christmas. I am so proud of the work I have done. Normally, I would never have taken on a job like painting my whole house. I think I am going through that change you go through when you are maturing in years! I have heard that in each stage of life, a whole new level of confidence comes through. I feel motivated now in my life than I have ever felt before. Maybe it's that I have realized that if I want something done, I have to do it myself and am willing to now.
I don't want to get old. I want the wisdom and experience that comes with age but I am wanting to keep the body I have. Smooth skin, strong muscles, health. I know it doesn't have to change that much but there is really no way to stop the aging process all together. Where is that fountain of youth when you need it?
Well, I AM exhausted so I am going to sign off. Have a wonderful night!
Monday, December 18, 2006
My friend Tash has this book called “Life is your dance”. It's a kind of a beautiful scrapbook you fill out. These are the questions in it and I loved them so here we go.
LIFE IS YOUR DANCE MEME
My favorite music: Music that inspires me! I love to feel energetic and music that makes me feel this way is some of my favorite but I love it all!
My favorite song lyrics: “I am no mermaid” and here they are.
We went down to the edge of the water
You were afraid to go in.
You said there might be sharks out there in the ocean
and I said I'm only goin' for a swim.
I was swimming around in circles
I wasn't always in view
You said we might get into red flag danger
and I am alone when I'm not with you.
But I am no mermaid! I am not mermaid!
I am no fisherman's slave
I am no mermaid! I am no mermaid!
I keep my head above the waves!
We were swinging from the center of the ceiling.
you were afraid to give in.
I said, “ I know I'll always live for this feelin'”
and you closed your eyes and said “never again!”
I was dancing in the middle of the desert.
you said “we'll burn under the hot sun”.
I said “I'd rather be the color of pleasure
Than watch like you from under the thumb."
repeat 1st verse
I love this song because it reminds me to LIVE and not be afraid of life! The music rocks too! It's from the soundtrack of Message in a bottle.
Peaceful places: I think my number one peaceful place is in my bath tub, I also feel this way in the mountains and if I want to stay clean, the temple.
Peaceful people My cute little, old neighbor Joyce. She is 50 years older than me but seems my age. She makes me feel calm
Some of my favorite people I really enjoy my kids. They are so much fun. They are happy and love to play. I really enjoy happy people. They are my favorites!
I went looking for beauty and I found Women. I truly believe we are on this earth to make it beautiful. It wasn't until God made Eve that he commanded they go and dress this garden. Ever wondered why? Hello! Women are the cherry on top, the frosting on the cake, the last, best thing.
If I am not I, who will I be? I can't be who I want to be. I don't want to work that hard. I know these women I admire and they WORK. They make the world better and I am not sure if I am capable of what they do. I don't want to find out and then feel like a failure! That's just the honest truth.
Glorious loves of my life -Oh my, The first would be Stephen. I still love him. I still think about him and hope he is happy. We met at SUSC and he was my first real love. Then came a few others here and there but the next one I really loved was Jared. I still love him too. Sometimes I really miss them. I have a hole in my heart where they no longer are. I know he too is married and happy I hope. I met Jared on my mission and wanted to marry him after we came home and dated. and we were very much in love. I was at the temple when I was specifically told I was not supposed to marry him. I broke his heart and he couldn't stay in contact. It was terrible. The next true love was my beautiful Bryan. The rest is history.
Parts of the world I would like to explore: I want to go to Europe and I would love to see Africa. I love our earth and really want to see it all.
Best memories of home I love to remember the holidays. My mom made them wonderful. I loved sleeping with my little sister and we would tickle each others arms. Actually, she would tickle mine and then I would pretend to be asleep. I remember playing dolls and sitting under the stairs with Gram going through old boxes of memories.
Things I love I love baby animals, good books, Thunderstorms, Sunsets, watching horses run, sexy thighs (men's thighs if you please), good music and good food.
Where is your quiet place? My quiet place in is my mind. On the coast of Oregon on a white horse. This has always been since I was a small child. I don't know why I created it but I go there when I am afraid or lonely.
New ways to show someone I care I don't know. I will have to think about this one.
My brightest moments When I am singing I think. I feel happiest when I sing. I hope I was one of the Heavenly Choirs that sang when Christ was born. I was at a Messiah sing-in the other night and when it came the the Halleujia chorus, It was so powerful and wonderful that there are NO words to describe the feelings I had. I want that feeling for the rest of eternity!
I used to be afraid of... but now... The dark. I used to have the hall light on as a kid. Now, I can't stand to have ANY light showing in the room and that is hard when you have so many electronics in your room! My husband thinks I am a little anal about it and he is probably right!
I will keep in touch with So far, I have already failed at this one. I have a hard time keeping in touch it seems.
flowers that I like best daisies, daffodils, anything dainty and beautiful. I really love them all but the little ones and the spring ones. I also love lavender.
the smartest thing I ever said to myself I am still trying to think of that! I have a few mantras that I say to myself. I like to tell myself that I am a great mom. Hopefully it will be a self fulfilling prophesy!
what I like about myself I feel like I am friendly and that I can like pretty much anyone. I have boobs now too and I like that! I was not so well endowed before my kids!
my wishes I wish to be able to kneel before God and not be ashamed of myself at the end. I wish for ALL my children to be strong in their testimonies of Christ. This is the truth. My heart breaks for those parents who's kids have chosen a different path. I so hope my kids will be faithful. I am trying my best to teach them but who knows? I also wish to be a marathon runner one day!
my kindred companions I only have a few really close friends that I tell everything to. You know who your are. I hope it always stays this way. I love you and thank you for loving me even though you know me so well.
Saturday, December 16, 2006
I was a kid once and I know what can happen at sleep overs. It's just like they say, the Holy Ghost goes to bed at midnight. Now granted, things happen in broad daylight too but I would say most happens in the dark. Kids are curious and will play nasty sometimes, I am aware of that and it is a choice they make to do. Then there are the times when it is not their choice and would definitely be termed sexual abuse.
I have a dear friend who's son, when he was about 10, went to stay with his dad for a few weeks. That dad had remarried to his ex-sister-in-law. She had 2 kids. So all three kids were cousins and step brothers and sisters. They were all within a few years of each other. Well, one night, this boy was woken up to his cousin doing something VERY bad to him. The 10 year old was mortified and did stop it but was ashamed to tell anyone. He went into a depression, became closed, his grades went down and no one new why. It was 2 years later when this boy and his mom happened to be watching Oprah, and the show was about this very thing, that he said something. Come to find out that the boy who did it too him had had it done to him and so on. These children had something happen to them that they will NEVER be able to forget. It will always be there.
I don't want this for my kids. Yes, it may seem over protective but I would rather they miss out than have to heal the scars for the rest of their lives. I have seem what sexual abuse can do to a person. My mom was abused, my 2 older sisters, my 2 closest friends. It destroys.
The reason it is on my mind is that my little sister wanted our 2 boys to get together Who never see each other much. They are very close. I love her son and he is wonderful and I really don't think anything would happen but we have already made this rule. My sister says she supervises but no one can supervise when they are asleep in their own bed.
Many people feel safer because they say they don't let their children go just anywhere. Do you realize that MOST children are abused by family and close friends? It is seldom someone who is not known well and you can never know. It doesn't matter if a man is a returned missionary, or bishop or priest or whatever. We all know that from the news.
You can't shield your kids from everything, but there are somethings we can do. One of my hero's in life is the mom of one of my best friends. Her name is JoAnn Hibbert-Hamilton. She is kind of famous in the church for being a child advocate. I spent a lot of time at her house as a young teen. She never let her kids have sleepovers and I hated that. I thought she was a prude and over protective. It drove me nuts because there were no such rules at our house. Now I admire her conviction when others ridiculed her. Her kids did have their own struggles but in the end, I think they are all active in the gospel. In my family, out of 9 kids, I am the only one. Hmmmm.
Anyway, I had told my sister that we'd better not. If I say yes here, I have to say yes there. Unless it's a family trip our camp out, the answer is no.
Friday, December 15, 2006
Anyway, I am in a quandry. Ever since I had my IUD taken out, I have been very hormonal. They say it doesn't affect you systemically but I am beginning to disagree. I totally notice a difference.
I am at a crossroads in life. For the last 2 months I have been totally fine about not having any more kids. This month I feel different about it. My sister thinks it just homones and to IGNORE them!!! She thinks I have too much on my plate already and she is right. Yet........
Bryan thinks I want to fill a void. That is true too. I feel like I am a great mom except to my adopted baby who drives me nuts. I feel terrible admitting it but I don't know how to change it. I keep remembering some prophet saying how LDS women will be the only ones willing to have more that 1 or 2 kids in the last days. I almost feel like I am not fulfilling my calling if I don't have more kids. I love my babies and I would love to have another baby, yet, I really don't need the stress and more work that comes with it.
None of my prayers are being answered about it in a way I understand. I have been wanting to give away all my darling baby clothes and things to others who may need them and yet I cannot bring myself to do it! It's making me crazy and it is constantly on my mind, consuming all my thoughts.
I do wonder if it is because it is that time when the hormones are raging. So the question is, how do I know what I should do? I need an angel to come down and advise me.
Bry doesn't want more of course, but he didn't want more after our first so I don't really trust his opinion in that! The reason it's all coming to a head is because I want to get another IUD. I can't stand these hormonal fluctuations, worrying about getting pregnant, and that awful monthly you know what. I had forgotten how awful.
So, poor me. That's my day!
Monday, December 11, 2006
Anywho, I think I may be done painting for now. I could still do a little more and I need to before Christmas but I am just about all painted out. I don't know if I can lift another roller! I think I may have overdosed a bit!
I am totally ready for Christmas and I love my new dining table. I just bought it. I have always wanted one and always felt it just wasn't a priority. Well, I am having Christmas dinner at my house this year and really want something a little nicer than the old table that has unscruboffable food on it! Actually, it's not that bad but ugly anyway. I'll put a picture on as soon as I can get my lazy but up and take one!
I've missed you all! So sorry I haven't been around. You all make my life so much more wonderful. I love you and I sure hope this season is wonderful for you too!
Wednesday, December 06, 2006
I have found that I am very picky now as to what I put on my walls. I want a certain look and I have given quite a bit of my old stuff the DI. They just seemed out dated and white trashy. I went shopping at Tai Pan trading company with my sister and bought lots a cute things. Love that place.
We are all battling that flu/cold that is going around. My throat is burning as we speak. Actually it's not my throat. It's more like the nasal passages at the back of my nose. Too much info?
Jake is home from school and Heidi is coughing and so is Gabe. Seth is the only one not sick. Yet. Poor Bryan goes to work everyday for the last week feeling like crap. We got this from that little foster baby we took care of for the week. He ended up going to live with an aunt.
Anyway. I still have two bathrooms and my room to paint. I don't know if I will get to my room. I am tired and there are a lot of heavy things to move in a small space in here. Well, I think I will sit down and fold a batch of laundry while I watch Judging Amy. I love that show. Bye now.