Monday, May 15, 2006

comments on birth control

I read s'mee's blog on birth control today. It was so interresting. I love it that people are willing to research to know. So many of us just do what everyone else is doing.

I also love how we can have differing opinions. Still there is no one right answer. It would sure be nice for Heavenly Father to tell us specifically what we should do but I guess that is where free agency comes in.

I use an IUD for birth control. I was completely aware of how it works before I got it. I do not feel like I am having abortions when and if I have a fertilized egg. I do not feel like a fertilized egg is a baby. I also do not feel there is a spirit there when it happens. I don't mean to be controversial but I feel very strongly that Heavenly Father wants us to do what is best for our families and bodies. I do not believe in abortions and I feel that the kind of abortions the General Authorities are talking about in those articles are about babies that have already formed. Babies that are 2 to 3 months or more along. I tried the pill. It was terrible, I tried the depo shot and that felt awful to. I have tried a diaphram and the spermicide irritated me pretty bad. I do not feel it is in the best interrest of women to just continually have babies or to use something that messes with their whole system. I may be splitting hairs here or walking a fine line but these are my feelings. I have 4 kids and at this point, would not want more for a while.

It has been said somewhere that in the last days only LDS women will be willing to have big families. I want a big family too. I know I can be pretty fertile and I believe a woman needs to find the birth control that works the best for her. I know that Heavenly Father knows my heart. I do not feel that I am being "bad" by using an IUD. I feel that I have a close relationship with him and if he didn't want me to use and IUD, he would tell me. I do want to have more kids, just not year after year! I think as LDS women, there is alot out there that makes us feel like failures. Things that tell us we need to be better and better. I think Heavenly Father lets nature take it's course. I do not think that just because a woman is pregnant, that He wanted that baby there. Believe me, I see it all the time with these meth addicted teeanage girls who lose their children. I do think He wants us to be wise and do what is best.

This is all just my opinion, remember. I hope I have not offended anyone. I have been pretty direct here. I love you all, my sisters.


Lisa M. said...

Melissa my dear, you have of course not offended me. I was aware of your feelings, prior and I have enjoyed reading your post. I like how you just put things out there.

Yolanda said...

I LOVE how you put your opinions out there!! Should I post my blog on Mary yet?

melissa c said...

Yes Yolanda, you should. I am learning to be bold. I think it feels good to be able to say how you feel and not be afraid of other's opinions.

mother of All said...

You say it well.

Dangerman said...

I think it has to be addressed on a personal basis, couple by couple, tri-relationship by tri-relationship (meaning every couple should be including the third and most important being in their decisions, such as this, without God we are nothing).

My wife is interested into looking into being a foster parent. Lisa said that you have done that and might be a good resource of information. I have not heard of a lot of good experiences and have a lot of people who say not to because of their bad experience.

My parents tried doing the Lamanite Placement program when I was in elementary, it was a disaster and I am against my family being a foster family (I have my reasons and won't discuss all of them here).

If you want you can read my wife and I's blog at (most of the writing is done by my wife...)

Mel said...

Well said. I enjoyed your post.