Latest update. Today, I am discouraged. I just don't know if I want to keep doing this nursing. I have had a really hard time the last 3 days.

My nipples hurt almost unbearably, and I can't nurse as often and as much as he wants to eat. I don't know if I should keep going or stop. I wonder if he isn't getting enough of the ariola (sp?) in his mouth but he WILL NOT open it bigger. If babies don't take in enough of you, you will get sores and it will hurt more.

I had a friend who had to bottle feel because her baby's mouth was too small to open big enough. Most babies who are bottle fed have a really hard time going to the breast and a lot of breastfed babies who are started on a bottle wean themselves from the breast. Bottles are just easier to suck on.

So, here I am. So discouraged. Bry thinks I should quit and just bottle feed. He sees how sore I am. I think I will call this lady I talked to before to find out how long it took for her and if she was this sore etc.... I'll let you know what I decide.

Update

I have nothing new really to write about. The nursing is coming along. Little by little the milk is building up and feeling less sore.

Wyatt is so funny. He is used to having a stiff nipple shoved into his mouth. Now, he acts like he is being teased with it being brushed against him but never shoved in! He has to relearn how to do it by going after it which is new to him. He is getting it though and it gets better every day. I love it. I had forgotten what a beautiful experience it is.

People who have a choice and choose not to nurse are really missing out. I have been drilling my boys about it. I tell them to make sure their wives nurse! So many women don't want to ruin their boobs. The Lady who I talked to who adopted 5 and nursed them all just got her first grandchild. He daughter in law isn't going to nurse for that reason. Imagine how she feels about that!

Anyway, if there is a way, breast is best.

I had forgotten how painful it was to start nursing.

I received my little "Lact-Aid" contraption and it is working. We both get a little frustrated though because it is hard to get the nipple and little tube in his mouth at the same time. And to get as much of the nipple area as possible so it doesn't hurt as much. It is exhausting but it is working. My milk is starting to come in. That was fast. Hopefully it will continue quickly to fill up more.

So, we are going to a family party today. I will see my sister in law's new baby they have adopted. A little new born girl. In a couple of months, my little sister will have her baby. How fun. I love it that there will be cousins to grow up with.

Gabe already loves going to her house to play with her son who is his same age. He cries when he has to come home. I can't decide if that is good or not!

I was supposed to go running today but I am too tired. It was a really hard night.

My Piano

The most wonderful thing happened for me this weekend. I had my old piano's keys redone.

The ivories were falling off and it looked and felt terrible. I hadn't played in a long time. It just didn't attract me. I hated how it felt.

This piano has a long history. I feel very blessed to have it. It belonged to my great great aunt originally. She gave it to my Grandma which caused a big fight in her family but she felt that it was the right thing to do. My gram gave all her kids lessons on it and then gave it to my mom.

Oh I forgot to mention. This is a very heavy old upright piano. My Great great aunt's house caught on fire once and she pushed it out of her house by herself to save it. It was the only thing she saved.

Anyway, my Mom then gave it to me. I was a music major, my older sisters had bought pianos when they had married and she could see that I was the most committed to music at the time.

I had it in my room for a long time. It took 5 big Samoan men to carry it up the stairs out of the house when I got married. It has never had to have any strings replaced and it has it's original soundboard in perfect condition. It has a tone to die for. It is no longer a very pretty piano as for as looks go but you'd be hard pressed to find one that sounds as good.

About 5 years ago I had the hammers sanded down so now they sound like they did when they were new. Saturday, I had the ivory redone. It's not real ivory of course. The old ones were though and I kept a few for sentimental reasons, but it looks beautiful.

I can't stop playing it. I love to play. I have given myself a new piano lesson and the sweetest thing of all is this....

Every night, when we put Heidi to bed, she asks Bry to watch a "mobie" (movie) in the other room until she falls asleep. She gets scared all by herself. Last night when I put her to bed, She asked me, "Will you play the piano in the other room?" She said it so sweet. I had played the piano for the last 2 nights just for my own enjoyment after she had gone to bed. It brought tears to my eyes. Bryan has been replaced. It made me so happy that she would rather listen to the piano than the tv. Who wouldn't?

My parents used to love to lay in bed and listen to me practice late at night. At least that was what my mom told me!

So, I love my "new" piano. It is my baby even still and I love to see it taken care of. It kills me to see people mistreat musical instruments. For me, they have souls and know when they aren't loved! Sounds weird I know, but I am a little weird. Just ask Lisa!

I have not been running. In fact, it has been the whole summer that I have not run. I had ordered some new insoles that would keep my left heel from leaning, thus keeping my foot from hurting so bad.

There were problems and the ones I got were wrong, had to wait for them to make new ones, then they were on back order yada yada yada.

So they finally came. I think they do help but I have found a bunch a little knots over that area of my foot that don't want to leave. It is the tendons there now that I have to train or fix. SO.......I ran a mile on Sat. No, let me clarify, I ran the first half and walked the last half. It felt pretty good.

Today, I did a mile again and it was super hard. I couldn't wait for it to be over. It was an eye opener. It can be so hard to start over. The foot is bothering me a little but not bad. I put ice on it and that helps. I think if I keep icing it and rubbing out those knots that it will get better. Let's hope.

So, We have chosen a name for our baby that we finally agree on. It has been quite the challenge because Bry only likes stupid names!! Not to be rude but it is true. Ask Lisa. So anyway, We have both agreed on "Wyatt". It is the first name that has felt like it fits him. Bry loves it because it is a cowboy name. I don't know why I like it because I didn't used to. It has grown on me.

So, there it is. It is starting out to be a good day! Hope yours is pretty great too!